Longing & love

While the illusory 'I' longs to be loved or to be loving, while it wants to find and know love, while it wants to arrive in love, there is no such thing. What it looks for is an experience of what it would call "unconditional love" while actually it looks for a conditioned love: A love that can be felt and experienced by someone. So, apparently, it goes on seeking, longing and hoping that it can find or regain this experience. However, there is not anyone. Unconditional love cannot be found because there is no one who has lost love. Unconditional love cannot be experienced, because it is not "something over there". What apparently happens is all there is and it is uncompromisingly and unconditionally itself. That is unconditional love.





The idea that there could be a real realization of wholeness is part of the dream of separation. "I am" is the illusion of realization: "I know that I am" is synonymous to "I realize that I exist" which is synonymous to "I am realized". As this experience seems to be accompanied by a sense of unfulfillment, the idea of an additional, greater realization arises. However, it is this first realization – "I am" – which never becomes existent. There is no "I" which knows about itself and which can possibly comprehend the idea of a future realization. That which is, is blindly and beautifully itself. There is no realization of it, because it is already so.



There is no answer to life


There is no answer to life as there is no such thing as "life" in the first place. Life is what apparently happens – it is total and real as well as empty and meaningless – however, it is never some thing that is going on. The impression that there is a separate reality about which questions can be asked ("What is life?", "What's the purpose of life?", "What is the truth in all of this?"), is part of a dream: The felt assumption that there is a separate entity and that that's who we are. There isn't. There isn't anything which we are. There is no "I" in the first place. There is no answer to life, because this ongoing thing called life and all the questions about it are dreamt already. The need to find an answer – it might be intellectual, emotional or energetic - is part of the same dream. No answer is needed as there's nothing that has been lost.





Love is not something that needs to be achieved, gotten or created. What apparently happens, is naturally whole and complete already. In that sense, love is the natural reality from which nothing is separate.

All teachings that try to create love or turn it into something that is achievable by someone are based on an illusion: That there is someone or something which is not love. What this illusion is looking for is a conditioned love. It seeks a love that needs to be experienced, a love that can be known and felt. It is a love that is identified by the possibility of discrimination. The apparent illusion "knows" quite certain, what is love and what is not love.

However, that's the dream: That something is love and that something is not love. That love has been lost and needs to be rediscovered.

There is no separation from what seems to be happening – and what seems to be happening is naturally whole complete. That's what's meant when it is said that love is all there is. It is the simple and natural "okay-ness" of all that seems to be happening – for no one.



Neither inside nor outside


There is neither an "inside of one's awareness" nor an "outside of one's awareness". It is one's awareness which is no one's awareness already. It is nothing but a function of the apparent body, yet, as such it is purely itself.

The apparent person tries to use awareness as a tool in order to find personal fulfillment. Either it wants to be aware of what it thinks will bring about fulfillment – good feelings, insights, the perfect partner, money, enlightenment – or it wants to consciously be this awareness. Again hoping to find something deeper by being that.

However, there is no one. Awareness is neither who we are nor has it any meaning. It cannot be used as it does not have any autonomous existence. It just is blindly itself.



No illusion


That there is no "I" means that there is no illusion either. It is only the "I" which wants to get rid of the "I". All these religions which want to transcend the ego, kill the "I" or see through the illusion are based on the idea that there is an ego, an "I" or an illusion in the first place. Yet, there is not. That there is an illusion is the illusion. That there is an "I" is the apparent dream already. Whatever you try to do, there is no one to begin with. It is this "you" which is without any substance. Nothing needs to be seen, nothing needs to be transcended and nothing needs to dissolve. There is no "I" in the first place.



No one alive


Life is useless – how could it be useful if there is no one alive in the first place?!

The attempt to use life in order to find fulfillment is part of the dream of being a separate individual. This apparent "I" experiences itself as unfulfilled and hopes that it can at least use its life. In that sense, it tries to use whatever seems promising in order to find a deeper satisfaction – friends, partners, jobs, situations, thoughts and feelings, its own presence, life in general.

However, what apparently happens, cannot be used. It is neither something real nor does it contain any deeper essence that could be discovered and used. This so-called reality – what seems to be happening – is utterly empty and utterly meaningless. Nothing can be found within it. However, this so-called reality – what seems to be happening – is also utterly whole and utterly complete. So again, it cannot offer anything further than the very wholeness that it already is.

Life cannot be used. It is what apparently happens, yet, there is no one alive.
Life is what apparently happens, however, it is not anyone's.
Life is what apparently happens, yet, it is as inexperienced as everything else.
There is no one alive within that apparent life.
That's the freedom and the love that is no one's.



No soul to be seen

What's the soul? - It is another description of an apparent illusion: That there is something which we really are; some kind of an energetic, spiritual center. In some traditions it is called soul, in some traditions it is called awareness, the "I", pure presence or something similar. In that sense, it is just another word for the apparent "I"-illusion, a self-description, so to speak. It is exactly this center which is without substance. It is what feels the most intimate and known to the person – its own presence – which isn't real. (Apparent) liberation is the melting back of that illusion into wholeness by the turning out that it never existed in the first place. This apparent death leaves nothing but what apparently happens. Surprisingly, there's nothing missing.



Keine Seele zu sehen

Was ist die Seele? – Sie ist eine andere Beschreibung einer scheinbaren Illusion: Die Annahme, dass es etwas gibt, das wir wirklich sind; eine Art energetisches, spirituelles Zentrum. In manchen Traditionen wird es Seele genannt, in manchen Traditionen Gewahrsein, das "Ich", reine Präsenz oder etwas ähnliches. Insofern ist es nur ein anderes Wort für die scheinbare Ich-Illusion, eine Art Selbstbeschreibung sozusagen. Es ist genau dieses Zentrum, das ohne Substanz ist. Es ist das, was sich der Person am intimsten und vertrautesten anfühlt – ihre eigene Präsenz – das nicht real ist. (Scheinbare) Befreiung ist das Zurückfallen dieser Illusion des Getrenntseins in die Ungetrenntheit, indem sich herausstellt, dass sie überhaupt nie existiert hat. Dieser scheinbare Tod hinterlässt nichts als das, was scheinbar passiert. Überraschenderweise fehlt nichts.




More german quotes by Andreas Müller in the area "GASTBEITRAEGE"


Note on spelling: highlights (color, bold, italics) in all text excerpts with permission of the author.



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